In a nutshell. It’s absolutely, thoroughly, often inexplicably in love with itself. I mean it gets hard just thinking about itself and then gets off thinking about itself some more. For the life of it, Galaxy of Tebow, it can’t understand why you don’t. At least not the Professional Variety. I mean, the World of NFL just has to pinch itself to remind itself it’s real. So otherworldly it is.
What prompted this little Primer is the new wave of columns and articles showing the “parallels”, “connections” even, between Tim Tebow and Johnny Manziel. I mean, it’s like they’re the same guy. OK, Tebow kneels. Johnny does his “Show me the Money” stance. But other than that. There are even NFL Owners who’ve expressed concerns about the “circus” and the “frenzy”. Haven’t they had enough of that already with Tebow?
I’m not going to knock Johnny. But trying to imply Manziel is a RockStar like Tebow is like trying to compare a sparkler to a SuperNova. Johnny’s big in that little World of Football. Tebow’s big everywhere. But, Galaxy of Tebow, you’ll never get the Football World to admit that because, well, it’s so completely in love with itself and just knows, so is everyone else. Anyways, isn’t Johnny Manziel ESPN’s “New Tebow?” I mean, if the Worldwide Leader with it’s WB Network like ratings anoints, that’s like the Whole World, right? Never mind that in reality, it’s like a few million people. Like about 1 and a half percent of the people in the US. Hey that’s everybody, right? At least, everybody who counts. Forget that more people in the US watched Germany and Argentina Play a Soccer Match thousands of miles away than watch all but a handful of NFL Games. (And nearly twice as many as any NFL Game on ESPN.) Forget that, according to a Sports Business Journal Survey, less than a quarter of the most “avid” NFL Fans dedicate more than the most minimal time and money to their “beloved” NFL Game. Over a third, spend zero time during the Off-Season and a quarter spend zero money at any time. About 60% of them say they’re “miserable” after a loss. But almost a third never even talk about their favorite Teams to recommend someone watch a Game on TV or anything else. And those are the most “avid” ones. Even during the Season, half spend barely more time than it takes to watch a Game. But it’s the King, right? By contrast, almost 4 out of 5 English Premier Soccer Fans identify themselves with their Soccer Club BEFORE anything else. Before talking about whether they’re married, have kids, their job, where they live, anything.
Galaxy of Tebow, you’ve heard me say many times that the NFL does not want passionate Fans. What you haven’t heard me say much is how much those who consider themselves Citizens of the NFL World actually are convinced they ARE passionate. Despite absolutely nothing concrete to back that up. In fact, all the hard numbers show the NFL World to be largely soft on everything but rhetoric. They’re strong there. They’ll tell you all day long how all that they are. That’s what has many Tebow Galaxians confused. You guys KNOW what passionate support is. Just like you know the difference between actually Winning Games and looking good Losing them. Something the NFL World seems thoroughly perplexed about.
Perhaps Tebowites, that’s the Great Divide. That dissonance you haven’t been able to quite size up. The NFL World isn’t as full if itself as it appears. It’s much moreso than that. And it just can’t get enough of loving on itself. There’s no room for the likes of you.
Same Sports Bimbo I’ve always been.